


trauma survivors need sleep too

by latlok (mxverity)



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Fluff, Gen, M/M, platonic sleeping together, shlav, this is for my friend jimmy who doesn't have a QUIZNAKING ao3 account
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-12-08 17:53:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11651697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mxverity/pseuds/latlok
Summary: Shiro feels that he needs to apologize.





	trauma survivors need sleep too

Takashi Shirogane is a lot of things. Friend. Pilot. Paladin. Trauma survivor.

He acknowledges what he is, good or bad. It helps him keep a hold of his identity, his sense of self. Unfortunately, he's afraid another label may apply as of recent events- a bit of an asshole.

The realization comes in the quiet after the storm. Slav has been rescued, their plans have been laid out, and Shiro sits on his own bunk, alone and awake in the dead of the castle's simulated night as guilt eats at him.

Normally, he thinks, this wouldn't affect him so much. Then again, normally he wouldn't be on the verge of a panic attack. Normally he wouldn't be faced with the same kinds of cells he was confined to. Normally he wouldn't be walking down uniform halls that reminded him of his own trauma as guards closed in and Slav slowed them down and-

There's a pain in his arm, and looking down he realizes he's clenched his left wrist with his metallic hand. Slowly, he lets go, and rubs at the redness as he forces himself to slow his anxious breathing.

It wasn't his fault. He knows that. He also knows that it wasn't Slav's, either.

Shiro groans, and leans against the back wall to his bunk. Much as the other paladins look up to him, he's still human (mostly). And Jesus Christ, is apologizing hard for humans.

Nevertheless, it has to be done. Has to be. He knows his mind won't let him rest, physically or mentally, until he apologizes. He rubs harder at his wrist, and makes himself stand and walk to and out the door.

No better time than the present, right?

-

The castle hums as Shiro walks down the halls, so different and yet so alike to those of the Galra. But the constant sound keeps him grounded, in the present. He is safe. He is alive.

It doesn't take long to get to Slav's room. He remembers Allura showing the Bytor where he'd be staying on the castle, not far from the paladins' own living quarters. Slav had been... apprehensive, to say the least, until the princess had demonstrated that he could come and go as he pleased.

Shiro frowns at the memory. His frown deepens at the fact that he's now standing in front of Slav's door, and he can barely hear the scientist mumbling to himself from behind the door. Carefully, hesitantly, he brings his right hand up and knocks, metal meeting metal to produce a tinny sound.

Slav's voice goes silent from behind the door, and for a moment all Shiro can hear is his own breathing, mixed with the hum of the castle. Then, muffled, but still clearly nervous-

"Who is it?"

"It's me," he responds immediately. He realizes as soon as he says it that Slav probably won't be able to tell who me is, not after such a short time. "It's Shiro," he adds.

Another moment. He considers going back to his own room, but forces himself to stay. It pays off as the door slides open, revealing a nervous Slav- not any more nervous than usual, Shiro thinks, but how could he know what the usual is after only just meeting him?

"Oh, hello." Slav wrings his top two hands, and it's only after he avoids Shiro's gaze that the paladin remembers to relax his frown. "It's rather late to be up. If you are suffering from sleep deprivation when the plan goes into action, our chances of survival fall by 250 percent."

Shiro is on edge, despite himself, but lets Slav finish before he answers- last time he interrupted, he had ended up being angrier than the situation called for. "I'll sleep later- and I'll make sure to pass on that statistic to the others." He's not sure he will, but Slav brightens, and it makes him feel just a bit less guilty. "I actually wanted to talk to you, first, though."

"Of course!" Slav scurries out of the doorway, allowing room for Shiro to come in. "I doubt you would come in the middle of the night without reason." Shiro steps in, and- and the room is covered with papers, which are then covered by numbers and equations and calculations, most of which are lost even on him.

He tears his gaze away, though. He didn't come to focus on math (much as he loves it). And turning back to Slav proves that the Bytor has calmed, somewhat, waiting expectantly for Shiro to speak.

"I'm sorry."

Slav blinks, then rushes into both speech and a misunderstanding. "Oh, if you're apologizing for interrupting my sleep, there's no need! I assure you, I have been working nonstop on how to make sure my gravity generator will work at top efficiency, because after all-"

"Whoa." This time, Shiro does interrupt, holding his hands up in the universal sign for Slow the quiznak down. Slav quiets, and Shiro lowers his hands as he speaks. "First of all, like you said, we can't have anyone on Team Voltron suffering from sleep deprivation." It comes out like a scolding, and Shiro doesn't miss how Slav's fingers begin to tap together as the scientist grows nervous once more. He moves on quickly. "And I'm actually apologizing for how- how I acted in Beta Traz."

A pause, until Slav repeats, "Oh," once more. It is quieter, now.

He straightens up, folds his many hands behind his back, and says, "Then I will apologize as well."

Well, that wasn't what Shiro expected. At all. He doesn't know why, doesn't know what he expected, but... "It was... understandable, looking back, how you acted. Mostly, I mean. I-"

"I am aware of my eccentricities." The sharpest Slav has been since Shiro rescued him. He softens, though, and shrugs. "They have kept me alive in this present reality for this long, however, despite some complications upon my capture. And you-" he points a single finger at Shiro, "are no different, having been a prisoner of them as well. Our opposing styles merely produced friction when placed in such a stressful situation."

Shiro pinches the bridge of his nose- and laughs. That was... easy. Everything he wanted to say, that he didn't even know. "That's a good way of putting that."

"Oh, yes! I went over all the ways that my rescue could have gone-" he gestures at a paper, somehow tacked to the metal wall with a dark violet circle, "- and despite the delays, this is one of the optimal realities!" Slav studies the aforementioned paper. "Even though I have no memory of writing this, it is extraordinarily accurate. It even factors in the separate possible cause of death!"

Shiro would be lying if he said he didn't flinch at that. "I- do you have anything that focuses on the, uh, math in just this reality?"

"Over here." He follows Slav's gesture, to a diagram of what he guesses is the gravity generator, or something similar, as the Bytor climbs his shoulders to get to a better perspective. "See, this is the velocity of..."

-

Coran is up before everyone else, it seems. Not uncommon, technically, but usually not long after he gets up, the other residents of the castle begin their morning routines as well. Yet the castle is near silent- with every sensor still showing that everyone is alive and well.

He decides he won't go Allura's route of waking up the paladins with a false alarm, and instead he'll do it the old fashioned way- noisemakers near the ear. Before he gets started though, he might as well ask their newest member if he'd like to join in.

He hums as he enters Slav's room- but quickly falls silent as he sees what lays inside.

Shiro sits on Slav's bunk, back against the wall, Bytor slung around his shoulders. Both are obviously sleeping, bodies rising and falling with breath. Shiro's fingers clutch a paper covered with handwriting- some Coran recognizes to be the paladin's, and the rest...

Coran decides he'll ask Lance to join in instead, and lets the door close quietly behind him.

-

Takashi Shirogane is a lot of things. Friend. Pilot. Paladin. Trauma survivor. Exhausted.

At least he's not alone.


End file.
